What is real anymore? The temptation to pursue perfection in whatever form

BY STEVEN KASZAB

There are so many distractions in this world: people, things and events that allow us to often not accept the truth about ourselves, family, friends, workplace, community, and things around us. Fooling oneself can be very easily done, while fooling others is a bit more difficult, but why the big attempt to present ourselves as something we are not.

Are we well off financially, even perhaps wealthy? Are we attractive, well educated, achieving souls?

In 2021 Monster Future Work Outlook Magazine carried out a survey of 400 people and found some interesting results.

• 60% claimed to be experts in fields that they had basic knowledge only
• 50% of the time they were employed was often extended somewhat while giving false reasons for leaving
• 45% made up relevant work experience
• 3% claimed to have a degree from an Ivy League university

I can see why this happens. Taking every avenue possible to get that job.

What about how one appears to others? Need to be attractive, well dressed, much more than presentable right?

Some people go under the knife, with a little tuck here, and something bigger there. Some women wear red, show off their hips, and add highlights. Men wish to appear as a taller, well-shaped fella, showing off a sense of humour, a stronger pitch of their voice, or perhaps growth of a beard. Often this is for show and tell, attracting a mate or trying to be one of the boys or girls.

Owning a pet to attract others works well too, whether you like animals or not. The stories of our lives can be embellished, changed, and made more exciting. Many of us want to be like someone else, or better, fitter perhaps, but the hard work required to achieve these goals can be taxing and show us that honesty first to ourselves and then others seem unwanted or unwise.

Ever seen an actress with age spots, wrinkles, a prominent mole on their face? Why don’t they do something about these facial markings you may ask? How can they be happy with themselves, how they look? Where is the temptation to pursue perfection in whatever form you may see yourself in?

The big lie is there for you to see. You may ask yourself are you too: selfish, arrogant, greedy in fact. Wanting what does not exist is often a fool’s dream, unless of course you are wealthy. Then you can be whatever you wish to be, even just yourself.

Skinny, fat, short or tall; near sighted, blonde, or red haired; handicapped, muscular or not. Don’t we come in all sorts of conditions, shapes, and sizes, presenting ourselves as best we can. We struggle to accept ourselves while attempting to live with others and their: glances, criticisms, opinions, and attitudes. If we care what others think of us too much, our ego oppresses us. If the attitude of others is not our concern we may fall into a state of ill repair socially, physically too.

Going to a job interview is very challenging, and yet a perfect example of where you can show yourself in all honesty. The boss finds out all in a period of time and how, so if you lie about this or that, the truth often comes out, thanks to social media and the internet.

Carrying an imported Versace purse may fool some, but as soon as they see how and where you live, the truth is out. I once knew a family in the neighbourhood, brilliant people, friendly but not very social. Years later I find out they had two children on the spectrum. Their parents hid them away, half protecting them, halfway embarrassed of their condition. Imagine the years these children lost and the opportunities they could have had to develop friendships and have fun with others.

Truth can certainly set you free. It is challenging, depressing at times, but also the tool that activates your soul to accept yourself, change your situation, and offer you the opportunity to change your life. Look within to understand yourself, always with an open hand to accept assistance along the way. After all, what are you here for? To help others who are in need and help yourself too indeed.